Life with God – Together Forever

Jesus gazes at us, His bewildered disciples, as we sit around the table.

It has already been a momentous evening.  Jesus first shocked us by washing our feet.  You heard me right – the Master actually washed our feet!  He then disoriented us by taking the bread and wine of the Passover meal and calling them His body and blood.  What exactly did He mean by that?  We were wrecked when Jesus revealed that one of us would betray Him.  How could any of us do such a thing?  How could I?  Finally, He aroused our curiosity with the cryptic words to Judas, “What you are about to do, do quickly”, followed by Judas suddenly leaving.  Why couldn’t Jesus’ assignment to Judas wait until tomorrow?

I’ll admit it: we are badly shaken.  This whole week in Jerusalem has been incredibly intense, beginning with Jesus overturning the money changers’ tables in the temple.  Some of us still can’t believe He did that.  The controversies with the religious leaders these past few days have seemed particularly sharp.  All week long, it’s felt like the tension’s been building, and something is about to snap.

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But none of these things, however, troubled us as much as what Jesus has just said: “My children, I will be with you only a little longer. You will look for me, and just as I told the Jews, so I tell you now: Where I am going, you cannot come.”

This is too much!  We’ve been confused before, many times.  We’ve had occasions of feeling overwhelmed and scared, especially when strong storms arose while crossing the Sea of Galilee.  But we’ve always had Jesus with us.  Time and again, He’s been there to rescue and reassure us.  We’ve become convinced that He is the Messiah, and that God’s authority lives within Him.  We’re safe with our Master.

But now to hear that He is leaving us?  I’m crumbling inside.  Without Jesus, life as I’ve come to know it over the past three years will be over.

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Jesus gazes at us, His bewildered disciples, as we sit around the table.  But His look isn’t one of judgment or surprise, but of compassion, understanding, and even joy.  And then He says, “Do not let your hearts be troubled. You believe in God; believe also in me.”

I’m trying to believe, Lord.  But what will happen to my faith when I can’t find You?  Tears well up in my eyes.  I feel on the edge of despair.  Master, comfort my heart!

“If I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am.”

Hope suddenly rises up within me!  We won’t be separated forever.  Even though I can’t go wherever He’s going now, we will be together again one day.  I feel relief enter my weary soul.

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At the same time, I still feel grief and a profound sense of loss.  Why, Master, can’t we be together now?  I don’t know how to live this kingdom life You’ve taught us without You.  I still feel like a lost child.  Don’t abandon me!  Being together sometime in the future sounds great, but what in the meantime? How am I supposed to do life now?

“I will ask the Father, and he will give you another advocate to help you and be with you forever—the Spirit of truth. The world cannot accept him, because it neither sees him nor knows him. But you know him, for he lives with you and will be in you. I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you. Before long, the world will not see me anymore, but you will see me. Because I live, you also will live.”

My heart skips a beat even as my mind is blown.  I can’t take in fully what Jesus is saying.  But something deep within me feels a joy unlike anything I’ve ever known.  I hear the Master say that the Spirit is with me to help me, just like Jesus has been.  I hear that somehow this Spirit will one day be in me too.  And most reassuring of all, I hear Jesus say that I will not be abandoned.  I will not be orphaned.  Jesus will be with me, and I will see Him – not just eternally in the future, but somehow even now when the world cannot.

“Anyone who loves me will obey my teaching. My Father will love them, and we will come to them and make our home with them.”

I am utterly undone.  My most crippling fear has suddenly been replaced by something more glorious than I could have ever imagined even in my wildest dreams.  I’m not an orphan, but rather I’m a home – a dwelling place for God Himself!  I have life with God, not only in eternity, but also right here, right now.  We truly are together forever.

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Wow, I have a million questions!  Maybe I can ask Jesus some of them as we walk to the Garden of Gethsemane after the meal, as He said we’d do.  It’s crazy: I don’t know what’s going to happen tonight, let alone tomorrow, next week, next month, or next year.  But yet suddenly, I know that I’m going to be okay!

When I get back to my room tonight, I think I’m going to write down these words.  Of all the things the Master has taught us over the past several years, these words are burning in my soul like no others.  Something in me is telling me that these words of life will shape the course of my destiny.  Does that seem audacious for someone so young to say?  Perhaps so.  But sometimes, don’t you just know?

The Master is still speaking, and I don’t want to miss a word. I have a feeling that He’s not done expanding my heart tonight.  Oh, isn’t it wonderful to be disciples so loved by Jesus?

Written by: Don Reynard